Style Guide: Composition

This style guide uses rules on composition to show you how to dress like a fucking man. The problem with most style blogs is they are intent on making you look like a peacock with a technicolored dream coat on; here we’re more about evolution, not revolution.




Oxford Street 28/01

Rules 

5. Two fingers are always better than one. Take two fingers and see if they slide in nice and comfortably. Clearly I am taking here about your collar. Do the top buttons up, and see if two fingers fit in easily. Do this, or choke to death when you put a tie on. If you can get three fingers in it is clearly unpleasant.

37. The bottom of your jacket should be level with the end of your arms. This is your visual middle. Raise or lower it too much and your proportions, and you, will look weird.

44. Big feet need structure. Look for toe caps, brogues and more structured shapes or you’ll look like you have clown feet.

I fucking love matey boy's look here. He is not pushing any boundaries, he’s not changing the world, it’s just a really fucking accessible, smart look. But your not here for pastiche, bland, smoke blown up each others arse opinion, you’re here for something a little more substantial.

The trick here is the different fabrics. The jacket and jeans have a rough texture, the rest is smooth. This means the overall look is balanced between smart and casual. It helps that the jeans are well fitted: no sag in the arse, slight break at the bottom and a rich colour. The jacket is a good fit: bit of collar, bit of cuff, and the jumper and tie give the whole look a finished smart feel.

Style Guide: Colour and Composition

This style guide uses rules on colour and composition to show you how to dress like a fucking man. Details, colour, shape, details, colour, shape, details, colour, shape, details, colour, shape, I’ll keep going on about it till you fucking listen.

 

Covent Garden 28/01

Rules

22. Layer. This should tie in with your colour palette and pattern selection. If you’re a 'differ' layer contrasting colours, if you’re a similar, build up a rich palette. This gives you an extra dimension to your look.

42. No Trainers. You are not a fucking B boy, if you are, run along now, there’s nothing here for you to see.

9. Up at the back, down at the front. If there is excess baggage around your ass it will do one of two things: it will make you look like you’ve shit yourself; or women will not see your ass, and will assume you’ve shit yourself. The added advantage of this rule is that it also shows off your junk. Trust me on this one, they are looking.

Like we do always, lets start with colour: his face is pale, his hair colour is dark, he is a 'differ'. He should wear contrasting colours, the colours should be warm. Like a fucking man, he's done that and succeeded in looking composed. By linking warm colours throughout (belt to shoes to trousers, all warm browns; the red in the scarf to the hat; the rich blue base; all these colours layered together make the whole look appear even warmer, including his face colour) the clothes are making him look actually part of his outfit.

Now onto the details: the heavy patterned scarf adds some fun and stops him looking stuffy, the hat, to a certain degree does this too, but it was fucking cold, so he may be just keeping his ears warm. I will not be drawn into posting pictures of people who look cool, but are in fact actually cold. We’re men, not idiots. And finally, he’s got a bit of a round face and a bit of a belly, but you hadn’t noticed that had you? The slouchy ‘knot’ and apparent V created by his scarf, the long tails of the scarf and the low open cut of the jacket, all give the impression of length and accentuate the vertical, which balances the shape of his face.

Style Guide: Menswear Details

This style guide uses rules on menswear details to show you how to dress like a fucking man. A shirt's a shirt, trousers are trousers and jeans are jeans; the secret is knowing that’s a load of bollocks, men’s style is all about subtle detail.



Covent Garden 28/01 


Rules 


28. Know the power of double breasted. The two rows of buttons will have a slimming effect, as the eye will read this as the silhouette, not your bulbous gut. 


47. Satchels are better than rucksacks. You’re not hiking or homeless. 


43. No Baseball caps. Only Americans and Baseball players should ever wear these. If I see you wearing one, you better be able to recite the words to the seventh inning stretch. 

He looks like he knows his claret from his beaujolais, he’s probably sabred the top off a bottle champagne in the last 24hrs, and more than likely, he’s got an opinion on the best way to gut and de-bone a Milliband brother; basically, he’s a lot more interesting than you look in your baggy jeans, printed tee and trainers. 


I’m not going to lie, he does look a bit like a smug posh twat, but he does show great alternatives to baseball caps, backpacks and single breasted jackets. Women’s fashion is all about overt, grand gestures; men's fashion is all about the understated detail. Here are three great details that elevate the mundane to the interesting, and lets face it we’d all like to be seen to be a little more interesting.

Rule 29

Just a rule on mens style today.  We're not just about casual mens style you know, we know our shit about smart mens style as well.  It's like we're slingin' crack-rock, and we got a wicked jump-shot.

29. Just because you have lots of buttons, it doesn’t mean you have to do them all up. Find your pivot point by squeezing your thinnest part of your waist (it’s the bit just above your hip bone). Half an inch down is your pivot point. There should be a button here, do it up. Leave the rest open.

Style Guide: Pattern and Colour

This style guide uses rules on colour and pattern to show you how to dress like a fucking man. The problem with wearing more than one pattern is you can look like bomb damage at a haberdashery store, but being aware of scale will help you look more Don Draper than Don Cherry (go on Google Don Cherry, you don’t know who he is)


Covent Garden 28/01


Rules


40. 2 Patterns. You can “clash” two patterns, but the scale has to be different


13. You’re a 'Differ' if: Your hair is a different colour from your face. You should be wearing contrasting colours; it enhances the colour differences in your face. The contrast will enhance your face. Fuck subtleties, you’re a man, only women and cats know subtle.


19. Create a highlight. Move away from just black, blue and grey clothes. I know, sometimes it’s nice to hold onto what you think is safe; safe is nice, you look into your wardrobe and it’s a sea of nice safe blacks, greys and blues. Fuck that you winey little girl. I’m not suggesting you start buying suits that would scare Jonathan Ross circa 2001, but a bright corner pocket, socks or scarf will make you look like you’ve thought about it, and you’ve got the chops to have a go.

Fucking Shazam!  Not fucking playing games this little ray of sunshine is he?  Two bold patterns are working well together here because of their differing scales of pattern.  If he’d had two patterns which were similar in scale, they’d fight for attention, but here they work well independently. By having colours from the same tones, they have a link. 

Mix in the fact he’s only gone and picked a set of warm colours which makes his skin tones appear warmer, and he’s used a strong contrast in colours which mimic his hair/face contrast, the overall use of pattern and colour is the bollocks.  And lets face it, he’s had a go; he who dares Rodders, he who dares....

Style Guide: Colour and Contrast

This style guide uses rules on colour and contrast to show you how to dress like a fucking man. The problem with wearing jeans, jacket and boaters is that you could end up looking like your dad. But our kid's dodged that bullet.
 


Borough Market 


Rules


15. You’re between a Differ and a Similar. You need to mirror the contrast of your hair colour to your face colour in your clothes. It makes the whole thing look more composed, not just a collection of things.


18. Work with your palette. Unless you’re a black and white minstrel, or you want to look like a French man, you’ll have to start picking out tones in your face to work with: eye colour, ruddiness of your cheeks, hair colour. The big advantage of building a wardrobe based on your palette is that more and more clothes will fit together, and you’ll get more combinations of clothes.


26. Only well fitted clothes look good. Too baggy, you’ll look fat and like you’re trying to hide something, too tight and you’re not going to look buff, just squeezed.

Here is an excellent use of colour.  He’s taken the slight redness in his beard and the blond of his hair and mirrored that in his jumper and his collar (jacket and shirt).  The contrast in colours is medium, which reflects the contrast in his face, to hair colour.  If he’d been wearing bland similar colours his face would have been washed out, similarly, having stark contrasting colours would have over powered his face.  Just to hammer home that everything is subtly considered, the shoelaces complement the pallet.

By keeping the shapes smart, but the clothes relaxed, you’re looking smart, but not stuffy.  The popped collar, and nice jacket pocket detail, shows an attention to detail that your average gob-shite will miss.  

The Moment of Realisation

Look at yourself, you’ve been dressing the same way since you were 13; baggy jeans, printed tee, some trainers and a few hoodies - the uniform of the apathetic teenager.  It’s time my son, to start dressing like a fucking man.  Society really doesn’t take overgrown teenagers very seriously, and now in life, you need to be taken a bit more seriously.  The problem is, you haven’t got a fucking clue.  You’re going to poke around in vain hoping you get lucky, but you know deep down your going to end up looking like a Peter Stringfellow, or worse still, your Dad. 

Unlike girls who have been refining their appearance since they were about 12, gently developing it for the last 18 years and discovering what works for them, you put some clothes on at 13, and stuck with it.  There are no women who dress the same at 18 as they do at 28, why should men?

Fair enough, you incrementally started spending more throughout your twenties, kidding yourself that there was a link between cost and style, but you were always one pay cheque short of the really good stuff.

DLAFM is not a guide to specific pieces, but more of a toolbox to help you understand the mechanics of what looks good on you.  Far from being a definitive guide, DLAFM should help you start thinking critically about how you dress, the effects clothes have on your appearance and how generally not to look like a fucking cock nose.